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Well, I'm still on my first handgun, but here was my reasoning for purchasing a 9mm:
Local LEO's recommended nothing smaller than a 9mm (they carry .40 cal) for SD. I considered the price of ammo: figured 9mm ammo was cheaper, so I'd be shooting more. Considered .45 cal based on older "stopping power" arguments, but then realized a JHP could have quite a punch even from a 9mm. And then there was the fact that I wanted my wife to be able to shoot it if necessary.
Once I got it, I realized that the level of recoil was quite manageable even for me as a new shooter.
All in all, I'm happy so far.
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