A Mean Spirited Comment Goes a Long Way

[dcb188]

Here is what we see a lot of and there is no way to control it, so I am just mentioning it. And it is only just a few posters, maybe four or so.
Someone comes on and says they just missed being killed by a tornado etc and a poster comes on and says, something like the following, and it is mean-spirited and unduly critical. Some are downright nasty.
"SO, let me get this STRAIGHT. You heard SIRENS but foolishlly looked out the WINDOW. Aha. Aha. Maybe you should listen to the sirens next time. NO OFFENSE but it was a stupid thing to do, guy"
Or a bad guy came around a corner and had eye contact with a good guy and nothing happened.
OH YEAH, GREAT THINKING NOT TO BE ALERT IN YOUR OWN NEIGHBORHOOD. WAY TO GO. GLAD YOU ARE NOT ON MY FIRE TEAM. LUCKY YOU AIN'T DEAD.
But you cannot legislate morality of any type, whether in society or on a forum. Cannot be done. But I wanted to mention it because it is annoying. It belittles the original poster and it is mean-spirited, but this is a free country and nothing can be done about the mean-spirited part of it.
We are 100% free to be nice or nasty ,as we choose. And people died for the right of freedom. But it is a shame that it is more than ever before the case where simply courtesy went the way of common sense, for quite a few folks. End of sermon and now have to climb down off my soapbox :)
I love the forums and have met a lot of great people on them, the vast vast majority.
Thanks also to Bumper for the way he runs this forum. Not many could do it with his skill.

[wmhawth]

True enough but I can tell you this forum is downright polite compared to others on the internet. If you choose to participate in some of the Usenet groups you had better have a thick skin.

[matiki]

While I agree... it is also true that this forum is generally more polite than others. Personally, I can get pretty worked up over how people judge each other here, but on other sites it's downright intolerable.

[ICTsnub]

Thanks for saying it, that did not seem like the impression I would want someone to have of this forum on their 10th post. I am 43, and this is the first and only forum I have joined. I am far from prudish, I just don't want to add any heartburn to my leisure time. It's amazing that a community with a population of nearly 20,000 can be so civil.

[Reborn]

The thing I see is there no tone of voice to go with an email or forum. The same thing happens at work. We are taught to be very short and to the point with email at work this sometimes leads you to believe that people are mad at you. 99.9 % of the time that is not true. I think a lot of the times people are just quick witted and that type the first thing that comes to there mind not really meaning to hurt anyone. I am probably guiltily of that myself. If I ever hurt someone here let me know. I will apologize. Some on the people here are friends on the outside and sometimes there may be a personal joke going on between two people that may be miss interrupted here. My nickels worth but probably only worth 2 cents.

[P95Carry]

Like the old carpenter's saying, "measure twice - cut once" ...... same in a way with text contributions ... "think twice (or more!) and post once".

there no tone of voice to go with an email or forum

This very true - and sometimes reading aloud what one has written can better show how many ways it might be interpreted. Add to this a morcel of ''do unto others .... " and also avoid the ''knee-jerk'' posts, where something can be written in haste while fired up ... when a pause to reflect might well mellow a response.

[B52]

I just don't let things like that get to me...life is way too short. I am just glad this forum isn't like packing.org, the manners on that forum were horrible.

[dcb188]

If we go back to my original post, I didn't say it gets to me or I can't live with it. It is only this: a simple simple true observation of just a few people. And when a new guy comes on, and one of the distinct minority does that, it is sad to see, is my entire point. Just sad, not that I feel like jumping out a window because of it, or think that the forums are bad, just that it is a sad and rather ugly thing to see. I could go in and point to examples but we would be here all day.

[B52]

I see your point dcd188, it is rather annoying. I guess you could report them to the moderators, but our Mod's are usually catching the folks with the quickness. I always communicate better in person and probably sometimes **** people off unitentionally in forum responses or short emails. People are all differnent I learned that very much so in bootcamp. What some find as humor other may not, I will try to keep that in mind. Sure is hard to do if you have had a few beers and its 1200am,lol. Take care brother...

[matiki]

Originally Posted by dcb188

....I could go in and point to examples but we would be here all day.

It's not normal to be here all day?

Maybe my wife has been right all along...