Halloween: an observation

Halloween: an observation

This is a discussion on Halloween: an observation within the Off Topic & Humor Discussion forums, part of the The Back Porch category; I noticed this years ago. What's the one thing you almost never see in a horror movie, or at least not until the very end? ...

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    Halloween: an observation

    I noticed this years ago. What's the one thing you almost never see in a horror movie, or at least not until the very end?

    Guns.

    That's because if guns were involved, you wouldn't have a movie. Michael Myers would be bringing a kitchen knife to a gun fight. Leatherface, especially being in Texas, would have been carried off in a hearse the first time he tried his shenanigans with the chainsaw. Imagine the guy in the mask from Scream running at a group of concealed carriers with his knife. They would have to market it as a comedy.

    I understand that you can't have a villain without also having victims, and gun carriers tend to not be helpless victims.
    "I practice the ancient art of Klik Pao."

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    Senior Member Array M1911A1's Avatar
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    Yeah...
    I've always wondered why Ichabod Crane wasn't carrying a brace of pistols as he rode home in the dark of night.
    If he had, the Headless Horseman wouldn't've stood a chance!
    Steve
    Retired Leathersmith and Practical Shooter

    "Qui desiderat pacem, præparet bellum."

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    Distinguished Member Array Rabbit212's Avatar
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    I ain't paying 10 bucks to see the bad guy get shot 5 minutes into the movie.
    Those are my principles, and if you don't like them.....well, I have others.

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    VIP Member Array OldChap's Avatar
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    I was escorting a bunch of kids, including ours when a guy jumped out of the bushes with a real chainsaw and mask. I had a flashlight and noticed the saw had a real chain and it was moving. The kids and mom's with us were terrified. I was mortified when he waved the saw within a couple of feet of one of the moms.

    Unfortunately for him, I had my cop radio with me so I called dispatch. The patrol guys showed up and hauled the Idjit off. I'm just not a big fan of Halloween. I am sure glad I wasn't carrying a gun!
    "The difference between genius and stupidity is that genius has limits."

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    Quote Originally Posted by OldChap View Post
    I was escorting a bunch of kids, including ours when a guy jumped out of the bushes with a real chainsaw and mask. I had a flashlight and noticed the saw had a real chain and it was moving. The kids and mom's with us were terrified. I was mortified when he waved the saw within a couple of feet of one of the moms.

    Unfortunately for him, I had my cop radio with me so I called dispatch. The patrol guys showed up and hauled the Idjit off. I'm just not a big fan of Halloween. I am sure glad I wasn't carrying a gun!
    I'm not.....

    M1911A1 and OldChap like this.
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    Quote Originally Posted by Rabbit212 View Post
    I ain't paying 10 bucks to see the bad guy get shot 5 minutes into the movie.
    Exactly. There would be no movie.

    It's sort of like the Friday the 13th series. Every single Summer, a group of teenagers goes to a cabin in those same woods where other groups of teenagers were hacked to death over the past 10 seasons or more. And of course, none of them have any form of weapon.
    "I practice the ancient art of Klik Pao."

    -miklcolt45

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    Quote Originally Posted by Rabbit212 View Post
    I ain't paying 10 bucks to see the bad guy get shot 5 minutes into the movie.
    I ain’t paying 10 bucks.
    Shootnlead likes this.
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    "I practice the ancient art of Klik Pao."

    -miklcolt45

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    Children dressed up like satan, isn’t that special.... 😉

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    ETXhiker, OldChap and SpringerXD like this.
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    There's a spoof commercial out showing several teens in a dark, scary landscape and some scary music. The teens want to escape the guy wearing the hockey mask. They stand there terrified trying to figure out where to go. One of the girls says "Why don't we get in the running car?" The guy says something like "You must be crazy, let's go hide over there, behind the chainsaws."

    Cracks me up. That commercial is so much like most of today's horror stories, it's laughable.

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    Quote Originally Posted by M1911A1 View Post
    Yeah...
    I've always wondered why Ichabod Crane wasn't carrying a brace of pistols as he rode home in the dark of night.
    If he had, the Headless Horseman wouldn't've stood a chance!
    I’d hate to be the headless horseman’s dentist. You wouldn’t make very much money. - Mitch Hedberg
    OldChap, M1911A1 and Sister like this.

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    Quote Originally Posted by high pockets View Post
    There's a spoof commercial out showing several teens in a dark, scary landscape and some scary music. The teens want to escape the guy wearing the hockey mask. They stand there terrified trying to figure out where to go. One of the girls says "Why don't we get in the running car?" The guy says something like "You must be crazy, let's go hide over there, behind the chainsaws."

    Cracks me up. That commercial is so much like most of today's horror stories, it's laughable.

    Remember, if you're on a Star Trek landing party, do not wear the red shirt.
    "I practice the ancient art of Klik Pao."

    -miklcolt45

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    VIP Member Array jmf552's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by SpringerXD View Post
    I noticed this years ago. What's the one thing you almost never see in a horror movie, or at least not until the very end?

    Guns.

    That's because if guns were involved, you wouldn't have a movie. Michael Myers would be bringing a kitchen knife to a gun fight. Leatherface, especially being in Texas, would have been carried off in a hearse the first time he tried his shenanigans with the chainsaw. Imagine the guy in the mask from Scream running at a group of concealed carriers with his knife. They would have to market it as a comedy.

    I understand that you can't have a villain without also having victims, and gun carriers tend to not be helpless victims.
    Correction: Michael Myers was shot countless times in the Halloween movies. In the first one, Dr. Loomis puts six rounds of .357 into him at close range. In Halloween II, he is shot in both eyes. It doesn't seem to have a huge effect on him.

    But if you really want to see what would happen with horror characters vs. guns, you'll get a kick out of this video from Matt Best:

    Attack Squadron 65 "Tigers", USS Eisenhower '80 - '83, peackeeping w/Iran, Libya, Lebanon and E. Europe

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    Senior Member Array M1911A1's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by high pockets View Post
    ...Remember, if you're on a Star Trek landing party, do not wear the red shirt.
    A good friend of mine called Star Trek's Red Shirts the "closet people," because that's where they seemed to have been kept until the script required that someone had to die.
    You'd never seen that crewman before, and you'd never, ever see him again.

    Kirk - "Spock, get a landing party together."
    Spock - "Yes, Captain. Mister Scott, please provide one of those closet people, in case we run into trouble."
    Scotty - "Aye, Mistherr Spook, but sendin' him doon wull play hob with the trransporrterr beam!"
    McCoy - "Don't worry, Jim. Tell Scotty that a shot of this Bourbon will quiet things down."
    Scotty - "Bourrbon?" (sound of severe vomiting)
    msgt/ret, Sister, OldChap and 1 others like this.
    Steve
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    A priest with a gun and a cell phone can end just about any horror movie.
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