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How to introduce the wife to firearms?

3K views 20 replies 18 participants last post by  tater_salad 
#1 ·
Hey all, I'm fairly new to the boards, as well as the firearm community, but I have an issue that I'd like some advice on. How did you introduce your significant others to firearms? My wife is pro gun (half the battle) and she has expressed some interest in learning to shoot. She was all for it until I brought the handgun home, and now she doesn't show any interest in it whatsoever. I am just worried for her own personal safety in a HD situation as I work third shift so she is home alone at night. In order to simplify things, I bought an XD-9, which I think fits the 'nightstand' bill quite nicely as it's simply point and shoot (I keep it loaded with one in the chamber as we have no kids). I explained to her the very basics for now that if someone breaks in and it comes down to it, she can just pick it up and squeeze the trigger and it will fire, but I'd like to get her more comfortable handling and shooting it. Any suggestions?
 
#4 ·
I learned in highschool not to teach a signifigant other to drive a stick. I suspect the same wisdom holds true on the pistol range. I'd give her the basics, fire a few hundred rounds so she knows which end of the weapon is which and pack her off to a class.

If you can't get her to do the class thing then give her the best training you can yourself, but REALLY try to get her intrested in a good class.

That's my plan for my wife... now to see if I can pull it off.
 
#5 ·
As others have said, take her to the range. Let her watch you shoot, so she can become familiar with the fundamentals. If you have a .22, have her shoot that first, although that may not be necessary - my wife was fine when I started her with a 9mm. Make sure she knows and follows handgun safety, and when she is ready to shoot, I would have her load only 1 round into the mag the first few times, until she is comfortable with it.

NRA also offers a good class for newcomers, I think it is called First Steps Pistol Orientation. I highly recommend that your wife attend it. The class consists of safety & general pistol instruction and range time.

Equally important is going over the laws in your state regarding the use of deadly force in self defense. You should both be familiar with these laws, so you know what you can and cannot do in self-defense. Check www.packing.org for the laws in your state.

Good luck, and keep up updated on how things are going.
 
#6 ·
Oh, and I'm not just saying this because she's a she and not a he, but don't give a completely new person your fire breathing pistol that makes so much noise it clears the firing line.

My cousin took his then fiance and future wife out for a little plinking years ago. He made the mistake of starting her on a .357 Magnum revolver loaded with 110 grain .357 Magnum loads I think it was.

When she saw that cone of fire come out of the end of that wheelgun, felt that recoil, and heard that noise, she understandably dropped that gun and it wound up in a creek. He recovered it, but the damage to the finish was pretty bad and plus he had to clean the heck out of it.
 
#8 ·
Pick up a nice 22 pistol. This is a great tool for her to learn the techniques of trigger control, sight picture, and weapon control, plus it is cheap to go out and practice a ton!! Then she should practice with the XD until she is comfortable with its manual of arms and manner of operation. As others have said, classes are a great tool for the neophyte.

It took awhile for my wife to join me on the firing line. Now she has her CCW and sports a nice and "cute" two tone Sig 239 she totes as her own. She has fired, and is familiar with, both of the weapons I keep in the "ready safe" for those bump in the night situations, (CZ 75BD and a XD9 tactical).

With a little training and some confidence your wife will do well. Most women are crack shots when given a bit of practice.
 
#10 ·
My wife suddenly expressed interest after years, and as luck would have it I was going to help "team teach" the NRA basic, so I enrolled her. She enjoyed it, and surprised me, the gun she liked best was a 357 wheel gun with a 6" barrel!! :eek:

The only suggestion I'd add is to start with sonething "light" line a .22, or .38 and work up. Starting with that 44 Mag could be a real downer to a beginner. :wink:
 
#11 ·
Find out if there is a womens only class in the area. That way she's not intimidated by being surrounded by males who will most likely bring their hand cannons to impress the other males.

Start out with the .22 pistol. Low/no recoil, no loud BANG, etc..

If you teach here, give her the basics (break down of, safety rules, etc..) and let her go at her pace, not yours. If you go to the range, don't try to push her into grouping, sighting, etc.. If she hits paper that is a good shot, no matter where it is. Don't crowd her, just let her do everything at her own pace. If it's an outdoor range, get some reactive targets so that you hear the "tink" of the bullet hitting the target. Reactive targets aren't just for kids you know (I still really enjoy them).

The most important thing, make it fun. You can also buy something that she likes after the range session to show how proud you are of her and to just show her that you care for her safety (or something like that, pamper her is what I'm trying to say).

Wayne
 
#12 ·
I have had to coax my wife over time - such that now she has her CCW and also is coming to range for some practice.

This was highlighted somewhat by local drug factors - peripheral to us as a family glad to say but nonetheless - sufficient to cause concern. I achieved some advancement thru scenarion descriptions - possible situations we or she may face - statistically low risk but enough to make her consider options better.

I would therefore suggest a similar approach - ''what if's'' - pointing out in particular the need to be able to safely and efficiently operate a gun - therefore it needs some practice!! Certainly much .22 practice is a great starter for most.

There is a need to encourage and strengthen the will of another to survive, that is where ''what if's'' can be useful sometimes.
 
#13 ·
Being a female myself I went a little overboard and started out big . It is indeed a bummer you guys do not have carry-conceal back yet. Take her to the range or find a begginers firearm course in your area don't know which part of wisconsin you live in . Start out with a 22 or a revolver or take her to your local gunshop she might be interested in something that would be easy for her to handle. Hope this helps merlin45k out :wink:
 
#14 ·
hubby started me out with a 22. i got the basics down and decided i wanted more fire power. I had a little push from my past also to learn how to defend myself. i bought my first .38 revolver shortly after. from there hubby says i went crazy. i now own a .22, 2 .357's, 3 9mm's, and a 45. and that is just pistols. my advice though if you want her to get into shotguns... don't start her on a 12 gauge unless you know she can handle it. from experience... first few shots went fine, i relaxed some... got popped in the mouth because i didn't have a good grip on it! i do own a few 20 gauges now. but go figure... i can hit 80% of the time with a pistol ( any pistol) but give me a shotgun and your safe. i can't hit anything. find out what she is comfortable with and let it go from there.
 
#17 ·
Thanks for all the replies! Sounds like I might get to add a new toy to the chest, I might be able to get that one (a nice little .22 pistol) past the wife if I can convince her it's in her best interests.:wink: Anyways, I think I'll also heed the advice of a firearm training class for her and check out what's in the area. Before I buy anything though, it'll probably be a good idea to take her to the gun shop and let her pick up a bunch of different models to see what feels good for her, and then if they have a similar rental let her shoot a couple boxes through it to see what she thinks. If all goes well, the wife should be nice and comfortable/proficient with a handgun by the time CCW rolls around in our state :banana:
 
#18 ·
My wife was so-so on a gun for her, she finaly bought one that she felt comfortable with, she still needed to be coaxed out to the range tho.
Signed her up for a basic pistol course and now she has her CCW so a class might just be in order.
 
#19 ·
Tater_salad,

A few years ago when I married my wife I was in the same exact boat. She was pro-gun but had never fired a gun (her father was of the opinion that a woman should never touch a firearm...).

She had absolutely no interest in handguns - so we started out with the shotgun. She was a natural at busting clays and loved it - in fact I couldn't keep her from embarassing me at the trap shoot. That translated quite easily to squirrel hunting... but that's another story.

The next step was of course the .22 - and this may be a better starting point. From there it was a .38 special revolver (she still doesn't like pistols) and she now has her CCW permit and carries on a regular basis.

For her - it is all about recoil. She doesn't mind a rifle or shotgun since you can absorb the shock with your body in part. But she doesn't like the hard recoil of a handgun so prefers the lighter recoil of the 38. A .22 revolver (or pistol) is a great investment since it will not only get her shooting a lot - but is good practice for yourself as well.

Good luck!

Joe
 
#20 ·
Interesting thing Ron - strikes me once we get our spouses or other ladies over the initial stages, things get easier.

My efforts of late with wife and our friend Sue - have led to them now actually asking me when we can go to range again:smile: I hope to achieve another session today and of course I think thing is, as they get better and more competent so they have greater confidence and actually gain way more enjoyment, and so wish for more.
 
#21 ·
P95Carry, I agree, I think that when my wife gets over the inital difficulties associated with learning about safety, learning about the weapon, learning to shoot, and getting good, that's the hard part. I just want her to get to the stage where she's comfortable with everything enough and hopefully starts to enjoy shooting as much as I do. Baby steps, baby steps, but we'll get her there. I think I want to get her to that point so that by the time we get CCW in WI, she will have the training (and hopefully the will) to carry for her own safety.
 
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